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3:40 PM ET, May 13, 2011

WeSmirch

 Top News: 
Hollywood Reporter:
SOURCES CONFIRM: Ashton Kutcher Will Join ‘Two and a Half Men’ … Ashton Kutcher appears to have won the Two and a Half Men sweepstakes.  —  Two sources close to the deal-making tell The Hollywood Reporter that the actor is putting the final touches on a deal to replace Charlie Sheen as the star of TV's No. 1 comedy.
RELATED:
TMZ.com:
‘Men’ a Go — Ashton To Make Way Less than Charlie  —  Ashton Kutcher has officially signed on to “Two and a Half Men” ... and TMZ has learned he'll be making more than half of Charlie Sheen's base salary ... but less than $900,000 an episode.  —  Sources tell TMZ, Charlie's base pay on the show was $1.25 million an episode.
TMZ.com:
Charlie Sheen: Ashton's Going Down With the Ship  —  Charlie Sheen delivered the ultimate back-handed compliment to Ashton Kutcher, telling TMZ he's talented but the show will tank.  —  Charlie tells TMZ, “Kutcher is a sweetheart and a brilliant comedic performer ... Oh wait, so am I!!”
Nellie Andreeva / Deadline.com:
It's Official: Ashton Kutcher To Star In ‘Two And A Half Men’
Discussion: Perez Hilton and The Wire
James Hibberd / Inside TV:
Official: Ashton Kutcher joins ‘Two and a Half Men’
Discussion: PopWatch and Celebuzz
DailyFill.com:
Ashton Kutcher Replacing Charlie Sheen On Two And A Half Men
Discussion: X17 Online and omg!
New York Post:
Baby due for Mike & Kelly  —  “Austin Powers” funnyman Mike Myers is to become a dad for the first time at age 47.  His new wife, Kelly Tisdale, is expecting and in her second trimester, Page Six has learned.  Tisdale, a co-founder of Lower East Side hipster cafe Teany …
RELATED:
omg!:
Mike Myers, Kelly Tisdale Expecting First Child
Discussion: TMZ.com, Digital Spy and Perez Hilton
Michael K / Dlisted:   Mike Myers Is Going To Be A Dad
Lynette Rice / Inside TV:
NBC rejects ‘Wonder Woman’  —  Well that was fun (to make fun of) while it lasted.  EW has learned that NBC passed on the much buzzed-about Wonder Woman pilot from David E. Kelley and Warner Bros. TV.  —  Kelley had penned a script that updated the comic book classic to have Diana Prince …
RELATED:
The Superficial:   ‘Wonder Woman’ Canceled Before We Even Saw Her Underwear
Nellie Andreeva / Deadline.com:
ANALYSIS: Why ‘Wonder Woman’ Didn't Go And What That Means For ABC's ‘Hulk’
Alan Duke / CNN:
Scammer calls social worker on Mariah Carey, husband says  —  Los Angeles (CNN) — New mother Mariah Carey got a hospital visit from a social worker this week, according to her husband, after someone complained that Carey was abusing her newborn twins by consuming alcohol and drugs while breastfeeding.
RELATED:
Kiki Von Glinow / PopEater:
Nick Cannon Surprises Mariah Carey With New Mom Bling
Discussion: omg! and People.com
PopEater:
Lady Gaga Ends Her Long Romance With Luc Carl  —  Lady Gaga has split from her 30-year-old heavy-metal drummer boyfriend Luc Carl.  According to the Toronto Sun, in an interview that airs today (May 13), Gaga told Britain's the ‘Graham Norton Show,’ “No, I don't have a boyfriend and haven't been on any dates recently.”
RELATED:
MTV UK:   Lady GaGa Announces Split From Boyfriend Luc Carl
Nikki Finke / Deadline.com:
Alex Pettyfer To Co-Star With Channing Tatum In Steven Soderbergh's Male Stripper Pic  —  EXCLUSIVE: This is going to gobsmack almost everyone in Hollywood.  Not only did Oscar-winning director Steven Soderbergh just choose 21-year-old newcomer Alex Pettyfer for this juicy role in Magic Mike.
RELATED:
TMZ.com:
Matthew Perry — I'm ‘Going Away’ to Focus On Sobriety  —  Matthew Perry tells TMZ he's making plans to “go away for a month to focus on [his] sobriety” ... as a proactive measure in his battle with substance abuse.  —  The “Friends” star issued a statement to TMZ ... saying …
RELATED:
People.com:
Matthew Perry Returning to Rehab to Continue Recovery  —  Matthew Perry, who has struggled with prescription pills and alcohol in the past, is going back to a treatment facility as part of his ongoing recovery.  —  The Friends star, 41, confirms the move in a statement that ends with a Chandler Bing-style dry quip.
Elise / INF Daily:
Khloe Kardashian Rocks The Camel Toe In Times Square!  —  Try as they might, the government of NYC will never really be able to class up Times Square when you have the likes of Khloe Kardashian running around in a denim jumpsuit with camel toe.  What on earth is she thinking?
RELATED:
Katelyn Mullen / PopEater:
Khloe Kardashian's Denim Look: Fashion Hit or Miss
Kaiser / Cele|bitchy:
Scarlett Johansson is “determined” to have Sean Penn's baby  —  The last we heard from Sean Penn and Scarlett Johansson, they were grinding on each other at the White House Correspondents' Dinner a few weeks ago.  Because they're classy and deep, that's why.
Discussion: Anything Hollywood
Celebslam:
Jessica Alba in Cabo . . . and the morning links  —  Jessica Alba in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico (5/12)  —  + More of pregnant Jessica Alba is in a bikini.  Damn.  [Drunken Stepfather]  —  + Joanna Krupa is still gorgeous [Hollywood Tuna]  —  + Leo DiCaprio is banging this now [The Superficial]
RELATED:
Photo Boy / The Superficial:
Jessica Alba in Another Bikini
TMZ.com:
White House Contacts Bieber — Can You Help Us Out?  —  Turns out Obama has some pull after all ... because TMZ has learned Justin Bieber has AGREED to help the President come through on a promise he made to a teenage girl last week.  —  Sources connected to the most powerful man on the planet …
Jo Piazza / Fox News:
Lindsay Lohan vs. Gravity: Is Actress Jeopardizing Comeback With Bra-Free Lifestyle?  —  Lindsay Lohan may be making inroads to repair her broken brand, but even if she can stage a comeback with her upcoming Gotti movie project, more damage control could await the young starlet.
Discussion: Socialite Life
Deadline.com:
Alec Baldwin Stays In ‘Rock Of Ages’ Film  —  In Or Out?  Alec Baldwin Will Be On Hand For Today's ‘Rock Of Ages’ Run-Through EXCLUSIVE: So let's update the Alec Baldwin vs Rock Of Ages small drama.  Yes, the actor showed up in Miami for the full run-through of Adam Shankman's big-screen adaptation …
Kiki Von Glinow / PopEater:
Vanessa Hudgens to Ditch Hollywood and Move to New York  —  It sounds like Vanessa Hudgens has had enough of sunny California.  The actress is ditching her Hollwoodland roots and heading to the big city, according to E! Online.  While catching some Parisian rays at the Cannes Film Festival …
Discussion: Perez Hilton and E! Online
 
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 More News: 
TMZ.com:
‘Bad Girls’ Star Spews RACIST HATE In Drunken Rant
Discussion: PopEater and The Hollywood Gossip
Daily Mail:
'I'm not a home wrecker': Alicia Keys denies claims she began relationship with Swizz Beatz …
Discussion: Cele|bitchy and coverawards.com
TMZ.com:
Mystery Celeb Negotiating Herpes Settlement
Discussion: Videogum
Elsa Keslassy / Variety:
Morel goes into ‘Overdrive’
Discussion: Hollywood.com
Mike Fleming / Deadline.com:
Cannes: Weinstein Company Acquires Rights To ‘The Iron Lady,’ With Meryl Streep As Margaret Thatcher
Scott Roxborough / Hollywood Reporter:
Martin Scorsese, Lars von Trier Team Up For ‘The Five Obstructions’ Remake (Cannes)
 Earlier Picks: 
Miriam Lacey / BellaSugar:
360 Degrees of Diane Kruger's Coolest Plait Yet
Discussion: PopSugar
Nicki Gostin / PopEater:
Will Ferrell at a Loss About ‘Anchorman 2’ Delay: 'I Don't Understand'
Discussion: The Moviefone Blog
Natalie Finn / E! Online:
Shania Twain Might Never Sing Again?!
Discussion: PopEater and Allie is Wired
Jennifer Still / Digital Spy:
Latest ‘American Idol’ result revealed
Discussion: omg!, X17 Online and PopEater
TMZ.com:
‘Jersey Shore’ Girls — Arrivederci, America!